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After Amputation Rumors Prove False, Tracy Morgan’s Family Regrets Selling All of Comedian’s Left Shoes

by Mike Morse

Just minutes after learning that Tracy Morgan’s left leg will not need to be amputated as a result of the horrific car crash​ in which he was involved earlier this week, the comedian’s family expressed their regret for selling all of his left footwear on eBay.

“Damn, I really should have gotten medical updates from Tracy’s doctor instead of TMZ,” explained Morgan’s cousin, Dwayne ‘Lil’ D’ Fredricks. “Now I feel bad about going through his closet and grabbing all that stuff.”

The family also expressed disappointment at the $287.69 they raised from the on-line auctions.

“Less than three hundred dollars for forty-seven perfectly good left shoes and sneakers that was once worn by a real live TV star,” complained Morgan’s step-niece, Trischa Cantrell, who helped Fredricks gather and sell the footwear. “The only bidder was comedian Kenan Thompson, who wanted to finally walk in the shoes of a funny ‘Saturday Night Live’ cast member.”

Upon hearing the news, Wal-Mart CEO C. Douglas McMillon sent Morgan’s family this generous offer: “For every right shoe, sneaker, or sandal that you bring into your local Wal-Mart location, 25% will be taken off the purchase of any new shoe, sneaker or sandal purchase of equal or lesser value (excluding sale items, designer brands, or footwear containing more than 17% leather). Offer good Mondays through Tuesdays, 7 a.m. to 7:15 a.m.”

“Hey, it’s the least Wal-Mart could do,” McMillon told Hollywood & Swine.

In related news, Morgan’s family also cleared up another unfounded rumor that has been circling around the Internet this week. Despite reports on the contrary, the Wal-Mart truck driver who caused the tragic fatal accident fell asleep behind the wheel due to not having slept in over 24 hours and not because he was watching Morgan’s Kevin Smith-directed buddy cop film, “Cop Out,” co-starring Bruce Willis.