Hollywood Sign

Cash-Strapped Los Angeles Sells Hollywood Sign to Chinese Corporation

In a last-ditch effort to raise much-needed revenue during a brutal recession, the city of Los Angeles announced today that it sold the iconic Hollywood sign to a Chinese corporation for $650,000.  Within minutes of the purchase by Hung Xia, Inc., a Beijing-based energy company, executives ordered the world famous landmark dismantled and replaced with their Chinese corporate logo.

In addition to the Hollywood sign, the energy company also announced that it had bought actor Christian Bale, whom the Chinese fell in love with after he filmed “The Flowers of War” in China last year.

Hollywood Sign

“We tried to get the Chinese to raise their offer,” Los Angeles Mayor Antonio Villaraigosa told Hollywood & Swine.  “But when they saw how desperate we were for cash, they played hardball.”

Upon seeing the Chinese symbols in place of the landmark Hollywood sign, panic spread among the many people who walk daily along the scenic trails surrounding the new sign, including actor and “Avengers” star Chris Hemsworth.

“I thought America was being invaded like in that crappy ‘Red Dawn,’ remake I starred in,” said Hemsworth, referring to his role in the soon-to-be-released action film, which has been sitting on a shelf for the past several years.  “At least unlike my movie, people will actually see the sign.”

According to a spokesperson for Hung Xia Inc., the company had originally visited Los Angeles several months earlier, in an attempt to buy the Los Angeles Dodgers, but lost out to the Guggenheim Partners and Magic Johnson.  Refusing to leave town empty handed, the Hung Xia Inc. set their sights on the legendary Hollywood sign.

“When Chinese companies now visit Los Angeles and see Hung Xia corporate logo hanging where the Hollywood sign used to, they’ll know that just about anything in Los Angeles is for sale,” a company spokesperson told Hollywood & Swine.

  • Joe Super

    Brilliant, just fucking hilarious.