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Daniel Baldwin Admits to Impersonating Alec Baldwin in Order to Sleep With Brother’s Stalker

Daniel Baldwin confessed to his family earlier today that he has been secretly pretending to be his much more famous, older brother Alec, in order to sleep with the “30 Rock” star’s attractive stalker.  Daniel’s revelations come on the heels of Genevieve Sabourin, the alleged stalker, being arrested in New York on Tuesday for violating an order of protection against Alec Baldwin, although she has proclaimed her innocence, saying she and Baldwin have actually been in a romantic relationship for over a year.

Daniel Badwin

Daniel Baldwin and Genevieve Sabourin seen prior to her not figuring out she wasn’t with Alec Baldwin.

“In her defense, she was sleeping with a Baldwin,” Daniel Baldwin told Hollywood & Swine.  “It just turned out it wasn’t the successful one.  What’s the point of looking like Alec Baldwin if you can’t have sex with his really hot, batshit crazy stalker?”

Daniel Baldwin, one of the original cast members of VH1’s “Celebrity Rehab,” said the affair with his brother’s stalker first happened by accident.  According to Daniel, he was at a New York restaurant pretending to be his brother Alec in order to get a better table, when Sabourin mistakenly began stalking him.  Later that night, he was confronted by Sabourin, who was holding a stun gun and a roll of tape to kidnap whom she believed was Alec.  Noticing how attractive she was for a stalker, he immediately asked her out.

Sabourin first became suspicious that she wasn’t having an affair with the real Alec Baldwin when every time she tried to contact the “30 Rock” star to schedule another date, he called the police on her.  She became even more suspicious when he pretended to be the spokesperson for Capital One, although he didn’t have a single credit card in his wallet.

According to Daniel Baldwin, he finally ended the relationship after his brother Alec lost 30 pounds earlier this year, making it extremely difficult for the puffy Daniel to pass for him.

  • http://www.facebook.com/michellemae.souza Michelle Mae Souza

    Geez, what a family.

  • BenKen

    And SHE’S the bad guy?!?!? It’s called Karma folks, leave the cops and courts out of it.

  • BenKen

    Ok you got me. Guilty!

  • DianeWE

    Omg a Pig is a Pig DNA you know!

  • kbrown2225

    You folks do realize that this is satire, right?

    • just_this_guy

      LMAO-they are apparently of the “you can only put it on the internet it’s true” camp.

      • hootannanny

        OUCH

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  • just another Templar, waiting

    It is only satire if you believe that it is satire. Otherwise it is alternative reality as in the Kalifornia law that allows boys to become girls and use girls bathrooms with them and play girls sports with them just by calling themselves girls instead of boys. Or the notions and laws that allow a man to take a husband and a woman to have a wife.

    That is the alternative reality of the America ‘Leaning Forward’, life can be whatever you want it to be. We just have to willing to sacrifice reality for fantasy, truth, veracity and results for falsehoods, lies, fantasy and failure. It is going to work out great with women playing at combat soldier too; if they only believe strongly enough that they are as fit, strong, fierce, aggressive and deadly as the enemy as they need to be to close with and kill them in close quarters then the women will succeed and deal death out to our enemies. Also men can start bearing children if they just concentrate hard enough about it. Maybe meditation will help men gestate children.

    Anyway, don’t worry everyone, it’s all going to work out great, all we all have to do is just believe; like we did for Tinkerbell, remember. ‘Lean Froward’… Ahh, just don’t lean too far or you’ll fall on your face, uhh, that’s a little to far America.

    Last one out please turn out the lights.

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