Christies Choice

Governor Christie Facing More Backlash After Allegations Claim He Wrote ‘Grudge Match’

by Andy Marx & Will McArdle

In the wake of allegations that he purposely created major traffic problems on the George Washington Bridge as political retaliation against a local mayor, New Jersey Governor Chris Christie is now facing an even more career-threatening scandal after accusations surfaced today that he secretly wrote the screenplay for the comedic misfire, “Grudge Match.”

According to Governor Christie, he had absolutely nothing to do with critically panned boxing comedy starring Sylvester Stallone and Robert De Niro and claims his political opponents who are spreading rumors he penned the screenplay are just trying to ruin his reputation.

Christies Choice

“These allegations are outrageous,” Christie told Hollywood & Swine.  “Like most of America I haven’t even seen ‘Grudge Match.’  The trailer for the film looked as funny as me forcing people to spend hours in traffic just to be a prick.”

Governor Christie’s accusers claim they have the arbitration letter that the New Jersey Governor wrote to the Writers Guild of America in an effort to obtain writing credit, in which he clearly states his contributions to the final shooting script of “Grudge Match.”

Bridget Anne Kelly, Governor Christie’s former deputy chief of staff, whom he fired today in response to the bridge scandal, has also come out alleging her former boss is primarily responsible for the horrible comedy about elderly boxers.

“For years, Governor Christie kept talking about this movie idea he had where the guy from ‘Raging Bull’ would fight the guy from ‘Rocky,’ ” Kelly said at a news conference earlier today.  “I told the Governor it was a horrible idea and luckily I was proven right after watching ‘Grudge Match.’ ”

  • Erlen Willouby

    Mr. Christie is a fine family man, a fine Chrisitan, a fine Republican and a great American. His involvement in the Jersey traffic problems are unfortunate but do not necessarily prove he’s a prick. Personally I doubt if he was involved in the Grudge Match film.
    Vote Tea Party, NRA, NOM and GOP in NOvember, 2014!

    • Jon Burrows

      You have exposed yourself as an imposter. No self-respecting Tea Party memeber would call Christie a fine Republican. Next time I suggest you try to obtain a more than rudimentary understanding of the subject matter beforehand.

    • Lacrobat

      “I doubt if he was involved in the Grudge Match film.” Nooooo, really? I’m shocked, shocked to find that stories on a SATIRE site aren’t true.