hillary clinton

Hillary Clinton Testifies Before Congress About Involvement in Beyonce´ Lip-Syncing Cover-Up

Within hours of Secretary of State Hillary Clinton appearing on Capitol Hill regarding the September 11, 2012 attacks on the American embassy in Benghazi, Clinton was forced to testify again in front of Congress to reveal details about her involvement in the Beyoncé Knowles lip-syncing scandal during President Obama’s Inauguration Monday that rocked the nation.

According to Republican Congressman Jeff Duncan, the American people have the right to know exactly when Hillary first learned of Beyoncé’s plans to lip-sync the National Anthem and what if any attempts do she make to stop her.

hillary clinton

“Beyoncé hasn’t let down Americans this badly since her Razzie-nominated performance in ‘Obsessed,’ ” Rep. Duncan of South Carolina told Hollywood & Swine.  “I’m just glad Whitney Houston wasn’t alive and didn’t have to see the mockery Beyoncé made of the ‘Star Spangled Banner.’ ”

Clinton denied having any involvement in Beyoncé’s lip-syncing scandal, and insisted that if she had any prior knowledge she would have done something, because she hates lip-syncing as evident by her favorite show being NBC’s “The Voice.”

“I don’t think Beyoncé did this to purposely hurt Americans,” Clinton told Congress.  “If anything, it was probably just an act of protest on the singer’s part that spiraled wildly out of control, the same way I first believe the Benghazi attacks did.”

Congress is also discussing bringing charges against Beyoncé for her massive ego, which they believe they can easily prove by the fact she directed a documentary about herself entitled “Life is But a Dream,” which will air February 16th on HBO.

“Washington has the biggest narcissists in the world,” said Rep. Duncan.  “But even we are humble enough not to make a documentary about ourselves.”

In related news, disgraced cyclist Lance Armstrong came out in support of the Congressional investigation into the Beyoncé scandal, admitting the longer Americans hate Beyoncé for lip-syncing, the less time they will hate him.

  • http://www.facebook.com/AryanaVonteese Aryana Vonteese

    is this a real article or fiction?

  • neemz2000

    To the site owners. Please put “SATIRE” in large flashing letters above all your articles as it seems many Americans are clearly too dumb to figure it out by themselves.