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Israel Faces Backlash After Releasing Boxoffice Bomb ‘Sex Tape’ In Gaza

by Andy Marx & Will McArdle

Israel is facing an enormous backlash from the international community after the nation released the boxoffice bomb, “Sex Tape,” in Gaza today in an attempt to permanently destroy Hamas’ morale. According to Hamas leader Khaled Mashall, the boxoffice bomb has had a devastating effect on his organization, leaving countless troops disoriented and confused.

“Most of them are still struggling with why this movie got made,” Mashall told Hollywood & Swine. “The worst part is how the Israeli military almost tricked me into going near this bomb because they knew how much I loved Cameron Diaz, Jason Segel, and Jake Kasdan’s work together on ‘Bad Teacher.’ Luckily, I saw a trailer for ‘Sex Tape’ months ago and realized right it away that it was a bomb. It’s a good thing I did, because I heard about the devastation this bomb had at Sony. Just ask Jeff Blake.”

Israel’s Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu immediately rejected the criticism for releasing the boxoffice bomb and declared his country will do whatever it takes to defeat Hamas.

“Luckily, the United States has provided us with tons of boxoffice bombs and I plan to release every single one of them on Hamas,” Netanyahu said. “If Hamas doesn’t surrender we will release the bombs ‘And So It Goes,’ ‘Jersey Boys,’ ‘Blended,’ ‘Deliver Us From Evil,’ ‘A Million Ways To Die In The West,’ ‘Legends of Oz: Dorothy’s Return,’ and ‘Transcendence’ in Gaza. Trust me, nobody wants that.”