John Hinckley, Jr., the man who shot President Regan in 1981 in a misguided attempt to impress Jodie Foster, is now furious with the Oscar-winning actress for waiting until Sunday night’s Golden Globe awards to finally reveal she’s gay.
“This information would have been useful a few decades earlier,” an angry Hinckley, Jr. told Hollywood & Swine, adding that he quickly disposed of all his Jodie Foster memorabilia after hearing the actress’ speech. “If I had known I never had a chance with Jodie because I’m a man, I wouldn’t have tried to assassinate the President to get her to like me.”
Hinckley, Jr., who watched the Golden Globes from his room at St. Elizabeth’s Hospital in Washington D.C. where he’s spent the last thirty-one years, was shocked after seeing Foster, his former stalking victim, finally admit she prefers women during her Cecil B. DeMille Award acceptance speech.
Hospital staff were forced to sedate Hinckley Jr. after he became furious during Foster’s speech, because she not only revealed she was a lesbian, but also because the speech rambled on, endlessly holding up the rest of the show.
Later in the Golden Globes broadcast, Hinckley, Jr. and his fellow patients caused a near riot in the mental hospital when “Silver Linings Playbook” lost out to “Les Miserables” for Best Musical or Comedy. According to Hinckley, Jr., “Silver Linings Playbook” was his favorite film of the year, since it told the inspiring story of a man sentenced to a mental hospital for violence, who finally gets out and continues obsessing over a woman. Hinckley, Jr. claims he hasn’t felt as connected to a movie since “Taxi Driver,” which also starred Robert DeNiro.
Hinckley, Jr. also revealed to Hollywood & Swine that he’s getting a sex change operation, hoping there’s still a chance for him and Foster to have a future. When released from St. Elizabeth’s, Hinckley plans to immediately begin stalking Lana Wachowski, the writer-director formerly known as Larry and the co-creator of the “Matrix” trilogy, in order to get advice on making the transition from a man to a woman.