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BREAKING NEWS: Missing Child Found Hosting Talk Show on Oprah’s Network

Ned Griffin, a 12-year-old boy missing from his parents’ Ft. Lauderdale home for over a year, and the subject of an intense, nationwide search, has been found hosting his own talk show on Oprah Winfrey’s low-rated Oprah Winfrey Network.

Since the boy’s disappearance, his family, friends, law enforcement, and thousands of volunteers searched everywhere for him.  According to law enforcement officials, the one place nobody bothered to look was the Oprah Winfrey Network.

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12-year-old Ned Griffin, whom Oprah Winfrey often referred to as "the next Nate Berkus," during the taping of "Fun With Your Inner Child."

Ned’s show, “Fun With Your Inner Child,” was on the air for eight months before he was finally recognized after a neighbor of Ned’s parents accidentally got a glimpse of Ned’s show as she flipped through channels.

“Honestly, I was more shocked that Oprah’s network was actually still on, than I was that Ned was alive,” the neighbor told Hollywood & Swine.

Ned told authorities he ran away from home to pursue a career in show business.  After being rejected by every studio, network and production company, Ned quickly landed a job at the Oprah Winfrey Network, hosting his own talk show.

Oprah told reporters she was relieved Ned was found and returned home, because the OWN network couldn’t afford to pay him any longer and was going to cancel the show and she didn’t know how to do it without hurting his feelings.

On the heels of Ned’s discovery, the F.B.I. launched a full-scale investigation into the Oprah Winfrey Network.  Within hours, they learned that three of the F.B.I.’s ten most wanted fugitives were also hosting shows on the Oprah Winfrey Network.

“It was the perfect place to hide out,” said Glenn David Fisher, one of the fugitives apprehended by the FBI. “I knew nobody ever watched OWN, so I never feared being caught,”

According to F.B.I. officials, the agency is now considering using OWN to hide individuals in the Witness Protection Program.