George Lopez

Romney Soars in Polls After George Lopez and Susan Sarandon Promise to Move to Canada If Obama Loses

With just one day to go before America’s presidential election, dozens of polling organizations across the country are reporting that Republican presidential candidate Mitt Romney is now soaring in the latest polls following George Lopez and Susan Sarandon’s vow to move to Canada if President Barack Obama loses.

According to every poll conducted since Lopez and Sarandon made their promise, including those by CNN, Rasmussen and Real Clear Politics, Romney continues to pick up gains among crucial undecided voters, who may be uncertain as to whom they should vote for president, but are clearly certain of their disdain for George Lopez and Susan Sarandon.

“I’m pro-choice, pro-Obamacare, and all for making the rich pay their fair share,” Steven Carter, an undecided voter from the crucial swing state of Ohio, told Hollywood & Swine.  “But the chance to finally get rid of George Lopez and Susan Sarandon is just too good to pass up.  That’s why I’m voting for Romney.”

In addition to undecided voters, Romney has also managed to make large-scale inroads among Democratics, many of whom see the problem of the ever-annoying Sarandon and Lopez one of the greatest issues facing the country today.

“It’s been proven that George Lopez has taken jobs away from qualified late-night talk show hosts,” said longtime Democrat Mike Driscoll.  “With him out of the country, that problem will now be resolved.”

The Romney camp is trying to capitalize on their new momentum by sending copies of George Lopez’s cancelled TBS late night show “Lopez Tonight” and several of Sarandon’s worst movies, including “Mr. Woodcock” and “Speed Racer” to millions of voters across the country.

But in a desperate attempt to stop Romney from capitalizing on the anti-Lopez sentiment, President Obama has announced he is deporting Lopez to Mexico later today, even though he was born in the United States.  Obama’s campaign is also planning a last minute media blast releasing ads attempting to convince voters that celebrity conservatives Jon Voight, Kelsey Grammar, and Stephen Baldwin will leave America if Obama is reelected.

  • margeryk

    From Canada, I was rooting for Romney, but if that means we get inundated with your wacko lefty Hollywood types—I dunno now.

    • Barbaree

      Sorry about that Margery. We hate to do that to you, although they’re always threatening to move, but never do. I think we’re stuck with them.

  • Waldo Lydecker

    If only you were funnier.

  • Nigel Hendricks

    Hollywood & Swine is much more clever than someone who picks a character from “Laura” as their screen name.

  • Mercy

    sorry Canada – you are going to have both wackos into your country soon.

  • Rattlerjake

    Why didn’t we think of this earlier and got all of Hollywood to agree to the same thing. Then once they move CLOSE THE BORDER!!!!!

  • Raeanne

    Too bad we didn’t lose you two. Canada already has great health care lol. Tried and true. Don’t et the door hit you on the way out.